Tuesday, February 12, 2013

my life is now before and after. two distinctly different lives. it goes without saying which was better. i'm watching everyone around me carry on with life unaffected while i sit here in shock and thankfully still a little numb. i can't believe that all that's left of my husband are pictures and memories. and soon our miracle babies. i have a lot to say but no way to say it. there are things i want to share and things i'm praying to forget. all in due time, i suppose.

one thing i need to say is THANK YOU. i'm still overwhelmed at how many people have generously reached out to us through donations, phone calls, cards, emails, stopping by with baby gifts, stopping by to share memories of mike...the list goes on and on. thank you to all who have offered prayers and love and support. it hasn't gone unnoticed and i know i've been given strength beyond my own to get through this last month. thank you, thank you.

as someone once wrote, my heart will never be the same but i'm telling myself i'll be ok.

***

the most recent photo of us, taken at my cousin's baby blessing at the end of december
HEBER--Michael Hjorth Kropf, “Goldberg,” returned to his Heavenly Father on Jan. 12, 2013 after unexpectedly passing away from a pulmonary embolism. He was born Oct. 13, 1982 in Logan, UT to Steven and Diane Kropf. He graduated from Mt. Crest High School.

Mike was an Eagle Scout and faithfully served a Spanish-speaking LDS mission in Arcadia, CA. Mike attended Utah State University where he received a degree in Human Resource Mgmt. Mike married Carly Allen in the Logan temple on Oct. 18, 2006. He was the best husband a girl could ask for and leaves behind an adoring wife who is expecting their first children—a boy and girl—due in May. He could hardly wait to be a dad.

He spent his life serving and loving others. He was our quiet giant and lived his life with compassion for everyone. He touched the hearts of all who knew him through his pure, Christ-like personality. He is an active member of the LDS church and served in multple Elder’s Quorom presidencies. He enjoyed hunting birds, playing golf, and all things sports related. He’s an avid USU fan and showed up for games hours early. He loved training and spending time with his dog Coco.

Mike was employed at Delta Stone in Heber City. He previously worked for the Driver’s License Division and Chase Bank in Logan.

Mike is survived by his wife, Carly, his parents, Steven and Diane, brother Jared (Sharon), brother Tim (Carrie), sister Beth (Jeff), and sister Amanda (Quintin). He is also survived by in-laws Gary and Susan Allen of Pleasant View, brother-in-law Drew (Leslie) and sisters-in law Kennedy and Paige.

“Clear eyes. Full hearts. Can’t lose.”

19 comments:

Camilla said...

Carly, you are amazing. I hope you know that. And I hope you know how much we all love you!

Tera said...

I think about you often. You really are amazing. Thank you for your example.

marta said...

i think of you every day, carly. i hope you know our prayers are with you! stay strong and know that God loves you!!

Ashley said...

I can tell he is a very loving husband and father. I'm thinking of you and praying for you and your sweet angel babies.

jess bahr said...

For quite some time now I have been trying to figure out what to say to you that would express my condolences. But there are just no words. I am so thankful to know families are forever and you will get to be with Mike again. I also know you are one amazing person. I have always thought so. And there's no doubt in my mind that the Lord has big plans for you and your little miracles. Thoughts and prayers your way! xoxo

Kim said...

I understand the wanting to forget, needing to remember...
It is hard to have memories etched in your mind and on your soul, memories you wish you didn't have. Through numerous priesthood blessings, I have been able to focus on the good and not as much on the horrible. It is so hard though, and those awful moments of finding your loved one gone, are the ones that haunt and bring us down.
I love you and have been thinking of and praying for you and the babies. xoxoxo

Julie said...

Praying daily for the three of you.

Jen Jarrett said...

I seriously think of you and your family daily. My prayers for you will never stop. <3

J. said...

You've been in my thoughts these past few months and my heart hurt when I read this post. You are an amazing woman with so much strength. I will keep you in my prayers, let me know if there is anything I can do for you.

The Kropf Family said...

love you Carly.

JaNae said...

Carly, you are beautiful and wonderful. You have been very much on our minds and in our prayers. Loves to you.

Brad and Darci said...

What an incredible woman you are Carly! I have been thinking about you so much and praying that you will have the strength you need. I hope you continue to feel the love and prayers being sent your way!

Jacki said...

You are such a strong, wonderful person Carly. Please know that I love you and don't hesitate to call if you need anything at all. (((hugs)))

Trimbles said...

Love you Carface, glad to see you back on the blog.

{Carli} said...

Carly,
I am not sure you know me very well if at all. I am a year younger than you and am friends with Stephanie(Grose)Smedley. I have been wanting to contact you since I found out about your husband through Stephanie. I know how precious and sensitive this time is so I did not want to overwhelm you when we don't really know eachother. I can see you have wonderful support, but I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for your loss. It is hard to understand why we go through the things we go through, but I do know that through the passing of my little boy that we are bound together forever and that is one thing that can get me through the moments of complete pain. I don't understand your loss and would never try to compare mine to yours but I hope and pray that you have felt the Lords hand comfort and strengthen you! I pray your little ones will continue to grow strong and healthy and that you will be able to enjoy the rest of your pregnancy, because it is such a special time! You are in my prayers! I know you have received many donations, I do not have any boy clothes, but I have some newborn girl clothes (my little girl was born in October) that I would love to give you if you would like them! Just let me know, and I am here if ever you need a listening ear! 801-737-6791

Carli(Pierson)Nelson

z&jarnold said...

I'm still praying for you. Your in my thoughts often. Sometimes it is just so helpful to type out your feelings and know that there are others out there who are willing and wanting to listen to the burdens of your heart. Love you, take care of yourself and your sweet babies!

marta said...

thinking of you..

Drew said...

I'd never noticed in his obituary until today how you made an active effort of saying things like "He is an active member" or "He is an avid USU fan." I'm always amazed at your faith and outlook on things, truly Mike still "is". He isn't a was or a has been, he still "is". Love you.

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